I opened up my pen + paper journal this morning.
My thought was to recap the week. I did that on the blog yesterday. I recapped the first few days and the entirely academic events to my spring semester in the penultimate year of my college experience. Nothing terribly wild.
Here’s the emotional + social side. Here’s a bit on the important life thoughts.
When you come back to college from winter break, there’s some pressure. Who do you connect with? Who do you message to meet up and get drinks with? If you don’t go out by the first weekend, are you a failure at the whole college / social life thing?
The other night, I went and saw my friends at our Harry Potter Alliance meeting. We watched a high budget fan film on Lily and James Potter falling in love. I sat in the back of room. In the group discussion afterward, I fell silent. Just listening.
Overwhelmed. It’s a word I toss around lately. Whether lightly in small talk or with blatant sincerity, it describes the first week back into the semester. Similar faces but new relationships. All these social gatherings when I was getting used to the couch, my headphones and my laptop. Essentially falling into the cabin fever feelings during these Ohio snowstorms. This week meant finally emerging from my ice-frosted house to see people again.
As a person, I’m halfway between antisocial and outgoing. It depends on the circumstances and the day. It can tip either way. Vacation with family (cats included) ended up leaving me in realm of getting used to existing and doing things by myself. Reading, writing, cooking, hiking etc. I still visited with people and went to social events, but it was so low-key, I didn’t even think about it.
This week has been overwhelming. For one, all the group projects. Maybe not all college majors are this way, but dietetics is very team-oriented. Every one of my nutrition classes this semester has multiple group projects on the horizon.
Don’t get me wrong: Group projects save from the concept of ten-minute solo presentations on community assessments, but there’s the whole thing of dealing with people in group settings for extended periods of time.
The second point in coming back, is that people wonder how you are, what you’re doing, when you’re going to meet up…So much to consider. Or, if there’s radio silence, there’s uncertainty. What happened over break? Are we good still?
Being social? What? How? It’s laughable to ask, but there’s a grain of truth in asking these silly questions.
Personally, I slip easily into being a loner and steadily warm up to the social life. It’s not essential for me to be surrounded by people. Still, I know with certainty that I could never live alone. I love making small talk. I kind of enjoy striking up conversations with strangers in odd places. Meanwhile, I can get pretty quiet in a friend group. It’s a weird balancing act.
Such is the life of a strange shadowy social butterfly in her various college / life adventures.